It's early Monday morning and Humphrey is snuggly sleeping in his Pittsburgh Pirates' bed. Though he has granted me full access, I'm not actually standing over him right now, but it's safe to say his hearty frame is wrapped around his body pillow. As manly as Humphrey is, he sleeps like a pampered prince and even sucks his thumb at times.
As he recovers from an active weekend, I can't help but reflect on his latest adventures. While there were many this weekend, Thursday night still stands out.
On the prior Sunday evening a nearly full keg was dropped off at Humphrey's place, but the house wasn't up for any consumption in the early part of the week. Exams loomed. Humphrey focused all week for two Thursday exams that he failed. So instead of buckling down to regroup and right his path as a prospective History teacher, he decided it was Nat-ur-day.
He invited myself and a few co-eds to listen to some country tunes and drink week-old liquid gold. Throughout the early evening Humphrey reminded me countless times that we were American. I can only imagine how devastated the poor guy would be if he ever found out that he wasn't actually American. (I haven't seen his birth certificate, so I can't verify his citizenship.)
As the night progressed, so did the consumption. It was well past one a.m. when the two of us decided to show off our dance moves. Two of the co-eds are dance majors and had asked us to their formal this coming Friday. It was time to show them a little preview for what we will bring to the formal.
Cue Meat Loaf. The stereo system in the common room belted out the American recording artist's scintillating voice. The song was one that Humphrey could truly relate to: I Would Do Anything for Love. I chose it because it's a classic in my mind. My father always played Meat Loaf in the car when I was young and it is as intense as a bat out of hell. I suspect Humphrey wouldn't have been so down to dance to it if he knew Meat Loaf is a vegetarian (a clearly un-American practice).
But it was no time to be picky. We were "Doin' it Live" and there were co-eds to impress. So we broke it down for the nearly eight minutes of musical magnificence. Our elegant movements lit up the faces of the co-eds. Our feet were in constant motion in what is known as "Crazy Legs." It is a dance my older brother Francis made famous during his time at JMU. I've only seen it once at a family wedding, but after showing Humphrey the weekend prior, we were ready to duet.
Our pace picked up as the music intensified and Meat Loaf crooned of "Sex and drugs and Rock 'n' Roll!" Our heads snapped back as our heels kicked up. Our "Crazy Legs" moved faster than Savion from Sesame Street. We were living the dream... the American Dream.
"As long as the planets are turning.
As long as the stars are burning.
(Humphrey addition: As long as nat-ur-falls are flowing)
As long as your dreams are coming true, you'd better believe it!
That we would do anything for love."
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